How can your body language help you?

Strategies for Making Your Body Language Work for You
 
Do ever wonder why you don’t get the respect you deserve? Do others often ignore you? Your body language might be sending out the wrong signals.
 
To alter your body language, you must understand what you’re currently doing with your body. If possible, set up a video camera and record yourself interacting with others. What you see might shock you.
 
 
Enhance your body language and your communication skills with these tips:
 

1. Make your presence known. Whether you’re sitting or standing, don’t be afraid to take up a little space. Spread your arms and legs slightly. Insecure people tend to do the opposite and attempt to appear small. Show that you’re confident enough to claim the space around you without apology.
   
   
   
2. Posture matters. Your mom told you to stop slouching. She was right. Sit like a professional in an office setting. Be proper, but relaxed.
   
   
   
3. Eye contact. This can be tricky. Too much eye contact can seem a little creepy, you don’t want to appear as if you’re staring. Too little comes off as submissive. Strive for 70-80% eye contact. When you look away from the other person’s eyes, avoid appearing distracted. This also takes a lot of practice as it can be noticed by the person you’re having the conversation with. I would suggest a lot of role play until you are comfortable with this and not self-conscience.
   
   
   
4. Mirror the other person. Within reason, mirror the other person’s stance and mannerisms. If you do it too precisely, they’ll think you’re crazy. Keep it mild, but adopt a similar style. Mirroring is a common Neuro-Linguistic Programming technique. You can find plenty of additional information online.
   
   
   
5. Keep your body open. Avoid crossing your arms and legs. Stay open to the other person. There’s no reason to protect yourself. Show that you’re relaxed. Turn and face people directly. When your feet and body are pointed in another direction, it shows disinterest and a desire to flee the scene.
   
   
   
6. Provide feedback while others are speaking. This means nod, say “mmhmmm”, or provide other feedback on occasion. It lets the other person know that you’re fully engaged and paying attention. Avoid overdoing it. Remember that you’re supposed to be listening. Use words like “I agree” or “I understand”.
   
   
   
7. Keep your hands away from your face. It’s distracting when someone touches their face during a conversation. Hands are dirty. Avoid putting them near your face. Remember you will be shaking their hands when you leave and you don’t want that to be their lasting memory of you.
   
   
   
8. Fidgeting and twirking. When you fidget, you seem nervous and uncomfortable. Shaking your foot and tapping your fingers is also distracting to others. Have smooth, slow, infrequent movements.
   Lay your hands flat on your thighs or interlock your fingers and keep them folded.
   
   
   
9. Don’t look down. There’s nothing down there of interest. You look evasive and bashful when you lower your head. Keep your head high and others will give you more respect. You’ll feel better about yourself, too. It exudes confidence.
   
   
   
10. Maintain an appropriate distance. It’s odd when someone stands too close or too far away during a conversation. This is often a cultural issue, too. Find an appropriate distance for the situation. You can stand closer to some people than to others. Think about this prior to your conversation or interview, if it’s in an office setting it will be easier.
    At a more social gathering is where you’ll need to take more notice.
    
    
    It’s not challenging to change your body language. However, it can take time for the changes to appear natural to others. Your body language is largely habitual. It won’t change by itself. Adopt a new technique each week and practice each day. In just a few weeks, you’ll notice that people are treating you differently.
     
    Until your new mannerisms become a habit, you’ll have to be diligent in your intentions. Much of communication is non-verbal. Ensure that you’re communicating with maximum effect.
     
    There are reasons we don’t just interview over the phone. Most everyone wants to meet face to face so we can see your mannerisms and your bodily reactions to certain questions or events. The more you start taking notice of this the more telling it will be for you.
     
    I am currently looking for more clients feel free to contact me.
    I look forward to hearing from you.
     
    All the best,
     
    Nick Kalogerakis
     
    Coach In Training